These are the products, games, experiences, and websites nobody asked for. But hey, they're (f)unnecessary. ​​​​​​​ I admire people like Kenji Kawakami, the godfather of chindōgu (useless inventions), and the person that invented the ketchup packet you can squeeze and/or dunk your nugs in. Amen.
desktop inflatable tubeman
Because why not? Take some textiles, a laptop-grade fan and a USB power source, and you can be that person with a desktop inflatable tubeman on their desk.
Real testimonials:
• "Where do I buy this?! Contact me pls." - Jon G.
• "I would pay good money TODAY for the desktop inflatable man." Rick Webb
High Toes 

They're like high heels but for toes. The footwear game is about to change, leaning fashion-forward on its toes. With High-Toe Shoes! Featured on Betabrand.
The high-toe sneaker was commissioned by the Design Director at Betabrand, demanded by the comment section. 
The high-toe sneaker was commissioned by the Design Director at Betabrand, demanded by the comment section. 
I had some haters in the comments on Betabrand. Some good laughs. Here's a few gems:
• "So stupid that it might actually sell just for shits and giggles." - @cautiouslego
• "I feel like I laughed a lot more than I should have." - @Gabridge
• "Please tell me they're a joke?" - @two_sheds
• "Stick to copywriting, shoe design is obviously not your thing." - Scott W.
• "This is not fashion, its stupidity." - Stacy N.
• "I am a woman and I would wear these. I don't wear regular heels, but these seem more comfortable." - Julia Marino​​​​​​​ 
Manet's Mayonnaise

"M a n e t ' s. . .   M a y o n n a i s e ." Sound it out. Combining French Impressionist paintings with tangy Middle American condiments. Now we can all class up our seven layer salads.

Coming soon: custom Manet's squeeze tubes.

ZZZVR sleeping mask
Introducing ZZZVR. The first ever virtual reality: the subconscious. It's literally a sleeping mask... shaped like a VR headset. 
Submission for Young Shits
AD EXTRAORDINAIRE: Andrew Jones
now, an intermission!  
~ If you've made it this far and are reading this, you're either extremely bored and/or you have a similar sense of humor. Anyway, moving on from products to apps, let's remember the words of the philosopher Plato: "Necessity is the mother of invention." Now forget that and repeat after me: Uselessness is the cool uncle of invention. ~
halloween costume helper
If you don't know what to be for Halloween and you don't want to be a sexy cat again, you can use this online generator. Click below and give it a go.
I made iDontKnowWhatToBeForHalloween.com to (sorta) help you figure out your costume with materials you already have. Although it probably won't help, unless you want to be a ghost. (p.s. the site is down currently, but — spoiler alert — it only "generates" a ghost result no matter what you enter.
DEVELOPER: Mario Menta 
NON-AESTHETIC DESIGNER: Matt Neylon

My Halloween costume, 2018

Save The Leftovers!​​​​​​​

Meet Lil Tupper. It's up to you to help him save the leftovers and food scraps from peril. AKA the trashcan. AKA their dEaTh. A game designed for Tupperware.

GAMEPLAY DESIGNER: Hector Rivas

Spot-ify
Emphasis on that hyphen. Some of us working in advertising conjure up hilarious ideas ("hilarious" is subjective here) for brands that would almost never happen, but make us laugh. Exhibit A: Spot-ify
Whereas Spotify provides music to listen to with paid ads interrupting in between, Spot-ify gives you ads (radio spots) to listen to with interrupting music in between. 

Spot-ify.com -- ads/spots on demand.
Spot-ify.com -- ads/spots on demand.
Spotify.com -- dumb music on demand.
Spotify.com -- dumb music on demand.
The Shy Pot
A watched pot never boils, so the idiom goes. But do you know why? Because it's shy as hell. Stop staring at it! If you need some practice, I made a game to do just that.
When you play The Shy Pot, your goal is to boil the water. But it only boils if you aren't watching the pot. Your phone's front-facing camera tracks your eye movement to see if you're watching or not.

LetDaddyFryIt.com
FryDaddy is a countertop deep fryer. He's seductive, and he can fry anything that'll fit. Some people are skeptical, so I made a website to answer a question as old as deep frying: Can Daddy fry it?
VCU Brandcenter student project
ART DIRECTOR: Gianna D'Amico
domain graveyard & incubator 
I've purchased a lot of domains that I think could be funny. A lot of have gathering dust. Others I've let die. These are those. 
cardibcardio.com 
codeofdress.com 
glutenfreefields.com 
hornyforads.com 
salvadordaliparton.com 
thegreatgaginthesky.com 
ute-r-us.com 
americangunreform.com 
budlightsaber.com 
contentdestroyer.com 
inflatableairquotes.com 
leasttrending.com 
manetsmayonnaise.com 
notanotherwhitewriter.com 
predickamints.com 
theshypot.com 
vapeandyoga.com 
allcapscaps.com 
adasiancy.com 

Peep other projects of mine.